Category Archives: Microtale

Dear you

Dear you,

I’m sorry I’m not very good at this “friendship” thing. Actually, I’ve never been. Honestly, I’m not very good at even having a conversation nowadays.

I don’t know what friendship is because I keep trying too hard, to be the funny one, or the responsible one, or the one they could talk to; whatever they expect of me, because of the time that they told me that this one thing, was why they liked me. “You’re good at things, you’re good with words, I can always count on you, you give amazing hugs.” (all lies) but this person inside of me, can’t understand who he wants to be, because he doesn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings.

And I see people around me, for whom it is just so easy, hi, hello, how have you been, a pat on the back, cool, I’ll see you soon, and I always turn away because I know that could never be me.

So then I go buy a cup of tea and stand there smiling trying to fit in, changing my personality like a chameleon hoping that out of those hundreds of people I pretend to be, you’d someday decide to choose me.

Because you see, (yes it’s f**king YOU!!) I don’t know what friendship is anymore, I don’t know what it means, or how it got so complicated.

So I guess that’s just how it’s supposed to be. Or maybe it really is, ‘just me’ who is wired differently. Is it? Can you ask yourself?

I don’t have a courage to talk to you nowadays. Not a single thing. That’s what you made me. Anyway, Here’s to every long lousy day I spent keep thinking about us.

In peace may you leave the shore.
In love may you find the next.
Save passage on your travels,
Until our final journey to the ground,
May we (NEVER) meet again.

My apologies,
Still working on it.
Z.

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January 2018 so far:

From Profession to Passion
From final year Project to real time Project
From declaring war to declaring var
From Insiders Arena to Windows Latest
From “E:/bau badhu” to sorry that was by mistake
From Loosing People to meeting new
From things I like to things I write
From Nightmare to Dream
From Confusion to Conclusion
Life goes

Breath

There is no room left for me to breath. Before I am completely awake, I can indulge in being somebody else. No one expect anything from me just yet. There is nothing to remember, so there are no burdens to carry. My fears don’t exists. Living feels so simple.

REALLY? HELL NO!

So many people around me expect from me. I can’t measure the weight of burden. My features do exists. Living is the most complicated I fo. The dead are still alive. Morning are sobering, to say the least.

But the truth is, I am just doing exactly what everyone else is doing – having nothing in my heart but being appreciated for lying and living. I am not even brave, it’s just too monotonous. Waking up, grooming myself for the world, a toy that just needs a twist to run.

Of course, I’m comfortably okay with the basic skills which I possess. I just wonder when people will understand that it’s okay to be okay. Everything that was, still is. So, weather I like it or not I pull myself together and I do it all again.

In peace, may you leave this shore,
In love, may you find the next, 
Safe passage on your travels,
Until our final journey to the ground, May we meet again.

After numerous failed rough draft, I finally wrote my masterpiece.

My dustbin was the only reader.